CJ Woods III’s Story Archive

Average

May 26, 2022 | by CJ Woods III

In the murder/mystery shows that I watch, eyewitnesses are asked to describe a suspect or bystander to a crime. They respond, “Average height, average weight…” And none of the inquiring officers ever says, “WHAT!? IS? AVERAGE!” But that vague description always bothers me: What is average? In my Shorter Oxford … Read More

Fall Down, Go Boom

May 19, 2022 | by CJ Woods III

A post on a social media site surprised me by using language that I had used with my daughter. When she was a toddler and came to us crying, her mother and I would ask her, “Did you fall down, go boom?” The post was about a song from the … Read More

The Elements Of A Column

May 12, 2022 | by CJ Woods III

This column first appeared in the December 14, 2017 issue. When asked how I come up with ideas for my columns, I struggle to explain my creative process. Some of my columns are born “full-grown,” while my other “children” have to be nurtured and cultivated before being sent into the … Read More

Friends

May 5, 2022 | by CJ Woods III

“You have good friends,” my mother said to me, shortly before she died. She was in a hospice in Maryland, and I had traveled from St. Louis, Missouri to visit her. On that day, our reminiscences were specifically about one of my friends who, on her journey with her husband … Read More

The Great Morel Hunt

April 28, 2022 | by CJ Woods III

The text from a friend lit like a fly on a trout stream, asking if I wanted to go morel hunting and hiking for a bit. I hit the bait hard, and Wes Homoya reeled me in. He advised me to dress appropriately and to bring water and snacks, so … Read More