Anybody who has been involved in kids sporting events is familiar with the parent who thinks that their child is on the fast track to greatness and already has that child’s pro career mapped out in their minds along with their Hall of Fame speech. They look at the coaches and officials as incompetent fools and are quick to tell them so. They see the other youthful competitors as impediments to their child’s performance and will violently engage anyone who doesn’t acknowledge their family’s superiority. Like the legendary stage mother in show business, they are always criticizing and attacking but never offering their time or labor to help. They are also disruptive to the rest of the parents and spectators and very often try to bully and intimidate anyone in close proximity to them. Most of the time they are trying to live their own dreams of sports greatness through their children or their frustration at being ordinary and they hope their kid’s success in a sports activity will make them “somebody.” They are a pox on any kids sporting activity.
In April of this year, a Winnipeg couple was banned from attending their eight-year-old son’s hockey matches for three years after they both got into a fist fight with the coaches of an opposing team during a juvenile tournament in Fargo, North Dakota.
In May of this year, former Major League pitcher Mitch Williams was ejected from a Little League game he was coaching after he directed a profanity-laced tirade against the umpire, opposing players and coaches and his own players in a ten-year-olds and under game in New Jersey. The reason? He directed his pitcher to bean the opposing batter during a game. The batter had hit a home run against his team earlier.
In Indianapolis in June of 2012, an umpire was attacked by the losing coach after a Little League Baseball game. The umpire was injured and the coach was arrested. The coach claimed self defense because the umpire had tried to defend himself against the coach’s attack.
In Los Angles in 2001, during a youth soccer game, an assistant coach tried to pick a fight with an opposing player who was 13 years old. Before it was all over 30 parents were involved in the ensuing brawl. Three parents and the assistant coach were arrested and several of the participants were treated for injuries sustained from being hit by purses, umbrellas, and baby carriages.
A basketball referee was attacked and body slammed by an irate parent in a high school basketball game in Pittsburgh, Penn. in 2004. The ref had removed a woman for yelling threats and screaming obscenities at him and the coaches and players. When she was removed, the ref was attacked by the woman’s husband.
A hockey mom in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada has been banned by court order from contacting her son’s coaches, other player’s parents, and the officials of the youth hockey league her son plays in. She sent over 3,000 e-mails and texts to the various individuals named who criticized the way her son was being played, demanded that other players who “didn’t play as well as her son did” be removed from the team in order to give her more talented son more playing time, and demanded a league investigation as to how her son’s team was being coached. The woman now claims that there is a conspiracy against her and her son.
I don’t have a good answer for these kind of people. They are as inevitable in kid’s sports as ants at a picnic. While you can’t always ignore them, the best thing to do is keep quiet and not let them spoil the moment. Also give your kid positive reinforcement — not just your own child but all of the other athletes. Let the coach know that you have his back. Better yet, volunteer to help work with the kids. Getting to watch your child or grandchild participate in sporting activities is one of the most rewarding aspects or parent- or grandparent- hood. Help keep it a positive experience for everyone.
snicewanger@yahoo.com