I’ve Become Older, But No Bolder

If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, he will be met with a success unexpected. — Henry David Thoreau

Anne La Bastille could have lived anywhere, but she deliberately chose to fulfill her dream, regardless of difficulties and discomfort. She learned to use all kinds of tools and even shot and skinned a bear that was threatening her dog. I’ve never shot a gun, wielded an ax, cut down trees with a chain saw and sawed a winter’s worth of logs, used a portable generator, tied expert knots in ropes, found my way by using a compass, or used snow shoes or skis. She backpacked all over the Adirondacks of upstate New York. Even though he had experience with backpacks from serving in the army, Bill fell in with my idea of backpacking in the Tetons. After that little foray, we sold our packs!
One of the reasons that her book resonates with me is that she was a tree hugger extraordinaire. Loving trees and considering them living beings as I do, I understand what she meant when she wrote, “Clearly the land belonged far more to the trees than to any human being,”
She was so knowledgeable that she even became a licensed Adirondacks guide which is a very special thing. Now, she wasn’t some hulk built like a football player. Judging from photos, she was a beautiful woman, and she wrote about having a couple of serious love affairs. Even though she lived in isolation, she had many friends. Part of the year she worked as a warm-weather ecologist in Florida and Latin America.
Different strokes for different folks! Our dear friend Jean collects shoes. There’s no way that she could fit her ninety pairs of shoes into la Bastille’s cabin; nor could we take our china and silver. However, after she and her husband, Bill, returned from three months in Florida, they realized that they didn’t want the cleaning, lawn care and maintenance of their big, four-bedroom, two story home with a basement family room. Forthwith, they put it on the market, sold it quickly and bought a smaller house. They divested themselves of a lot of possessions, but I’ll bet that shoe maven Jean took those shoes with her!
Many people have unachieved dreams. We worry and nitpick our way through life and place monetary, physical and cultural limitations on ourselves. Oh, there are infinite excuses for not fulfilling our hearts’ content. I know, because I’ve used many of them. We kick the can of our dreams down the road into Tomorrowland, but tomorrow remains tantalizingly on the horizon.
A few years ago, I wrote a column about a program that I saw on PBS that was entitled “Growing Bolder.” It featured aging dream chasers who had the courage to pursue their passions even though they were elderly. They were painting, performing rock and roll music, flying, running, renovating buildings or doing motocross.
I concluded by saying, “That’s what I mean to do: I’m going to forget about being old and focus on being bold. Didn’t do it! My mother used to say, “We must cut our suits to fit the cloth.” Sometimes we must live within parameters that we cannot change. Writing these columns shows me the wisdom of Thoreau’s advice:
Be, rather, the Lewis and Clarke of your own streams and oceans, explore your own higher latitudes . . . be a Columbus to whole new continents and worlds within you, opening new channels, not of trade, but of thought . . .
One’s priorities change: Rather than yearning for grand adventures in exotic places, a home near the beach, in the Colorado mountains or Paris, I shall stay where I’ve been planted and enjoy a deepening relationship with my dear husband. I am content.
P.S. La Bastille and Thoreau would be right in style today. “Tiny” houses are the new fad. wclarke@comcast.net