I finally had to promise Vadel that we’ll call him if we need help even though one of my dear nephews lives ten minutes away and another one lives just across the county line. This tremendous concern about old people is just one example of the vast cultural differences between Mauritania and the U.S. that cannot be bridged.
He said many years ago, “You could never understand our tribal system.” This makes me wonder if our officials have failed to recognize the role of such groups in Afghanistan, Iraq and Syria.
He also explained that there are strict classes in Mauritania, and that one cannot move from one to another. He said, “Let’s say that you have a wonderful singing voice. It would not be possible for you to be a professional singer because that is reserved for the musician class.” There is also a military class and a scholar class.
Mauritania was the last nation in the world to abolish slavery. It still exists, although illegal, and some are trying to do away with it. He said in a paternalistic manner, “My family’s slaves eat with us. We clothe and house them, and they depend on us. They could not get along without us.” “Vadel,” I responded, “Slavery is slavery, regardless!”
I also asked him about the female circumcision — eek! — that is practiced in Mauritania as well as other Islamic nations. Also called genital mutilation, it’s on the rise in the U.S. among Muslims who have come here.
When we first knew him I asked if women worked outside the home. He chuckled and said, “No. We’d have to watch them all the time to know what they are doing. Anyway, why should they work? They are treated like queens!” However, Vadel’s wife had a job before their marriage.
A devout Muslim, Vadel is also very tolerant. The only criticism I’ve heard him make about America is to say mildly, “American females could stand to wear more clothes.” When I consider the Victoria’s Secret commercials on TV I agree, although I strongly believe in the right of women to dress as they choose. Vadel is very modest. He refuses to go to the Y because he’d have to disrobe in front of other males.
After he left, Bill and I chuckled. He wants his children to be educated in American schools. “However,” he said, “My daughters will absolutely wear the head covering, and there will be no dating or staying out late at night when they are teenagers!” I think that he’d better investigate private schools.
He reminisced about his experiences in America. When he first came to the U.S. he went to Washington, D.C. One day he wrecked his motorcycle and was taken to a hospital. He spoke only a few words of English, but felt that he ought to say something to the people who were taking care of him. “All I could think of to say was ‘Thank you.’ I said it over and over. ‘Thank you! . . . Thank you! . . .Thank you!’ All day long I said ‘Thank you.’ They even kept my motorcycle for me.”
Vadel left here and worked nights as a cashier at a gas station in a rough neighborhood in Chicago. Even though he worked in a bullet-proof cage, he packed a gun. One night a guy came in and tried to hold him up. Oh dear, he has learned some very bad American words since we first knew him! He said to the robber, “You bleeping bleeper, your bleeping little gun will not shoot through this bulletproof glass, but my gun is bigger, and it will. Now get out before I shoot you!” We couldn’t help laughing when we heard such words spoken by our charming, courteous and mild-mannered Vadel. More to come. wclarke@comcast.net