One of my nieces — who is actually, the daughter of one of my best friends — had a childhood habit: She would often break into a frenetic dance of joy, freely flinging her internal happiness outward toward whatever audience was before her. I have written previously of her spontaneous expressions of outrageous joy, but I often think of her behavior now, especially when I see so many demonstrations of anger.
When I lived in St. Louis, MO., I was a frequent passenger on the city’s light rail system. The Union Station stop was near my apartment, and when business travel was required of me, I took the train to and from the airport. I was at that stop one day — I don’t remember why — when a woman bounced out of the train’s sliding doors and onto the platform. I noticed her brisk disembarkation because of her energetic step and her open and curious face and body language. The woman, a stranger to me, turned to me and said, “The Scott Joplin house is near here, isn’t it? Do you want to go? Let’s go.” Another time in St. Louis, as the assistant creative director of a retail advertising department, I interviewed an art director candidate. When we were done, I offered to take her to lunch. Outside the store, delighted both by her presence and the opportunity to work with a qualified professional, I “went headlong over all the social fences,” proffered my arm, which she took, an action and reaction born of the moment. We walked arm-in-arm down the street. In Indianapolis, a few years ago, I visited the offices of the ladies who craft this publication, but not before I stopped at a florist to buy each of them a rose. My arrival was unexpected, as was the gift I brought, a surprise salve to some emotional burns. “We were having a bad day,” said someone. “We needed that.”
The woman whose ingenuous invitation to share in her visit to an historic site, seemed not to have issued it burdened with fear, but purely for the sole and innocent purpose of sharing the experience, and I regret that I did not travel that road with her. But I did not restrain the impulse to stick out my arm to a charming young woman, (behavior that, as her nascent supervisor, might have drawn criticism) and when I thought of buying flowers for four hard-working people, I did not hesitate to do so. I have a good friend who sends me random texts of affirmation, such as, “Just need to inform you that you have no idea about all the reasons why I love you…” And when my young niece felt internal joy, she did not hesitate to share it.
I seem to be returning, often, to the notion of “doing good,” and showing and sharing caring and concern. It may be a reflection of my own emotional state, or an awareness of the angst and anger of the general population. Whatever the reason, I do not think it too much to ask for us to show decency toward each other. One of the things that I most desire to have my children and grandchildren learn, is to be decent human beings. Small expressions of grace, set free from a giving heart, can bring joy to even the grumpiest soul. And for those among us who need an excuse, we have a day coming up — February 14th — that gives us an opportunity to do that. Your aim does not have to be specific for your good will to hit the mark.