“Summertime, and the livin’ is easy,
Fish are jumpin’ . . . ”
— Gershwin, “Porgy and Bess”
Our son-in-law, Tom, is an avid fisherman. Last October his dream of owning a house on a significant body of water was realized when he and Vicki bought a home on Lake Shaffer.
Stories that will be passed on are already being stored up. Vicki’s eldest son, Bill, and his best friend, John, came for a “guy’s” weekend. While twin grandson, Tony, and Tom played golf, John and Bill went fishing, using the 14-foot long motorboat that Tom inherited from his dad.
Eek! A “huge” snake — undoubtedly the size of a boa constrictor — crawled out of the water onto the boat. John broke his fishing pole, beating the snake until it slithered back into the water. One Sunday evening, Tom caught a large bass. Satisfied, he was gazing at the sky, daydreaming and enjoying a peaceful interlude before having to return to the hurly-burly of Chicago where he works. He said, “I finally looked down, and there was a snake on the end of the boat! I hope no one heard me scream like a girl!” He, too, beat off the snake with his fishing pole. The island near which he was fishing has now been dubbed “Snake Island.”
“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them . . .”
— Henry David Thoreau, Walden
People have all kinds of reasons for kicking their dreams into tomorrow: They can’t afford it, don’t have time, have too many obligations, can’t go to Italy because they don’t speak Italian, need to remain close to their families or physicians . . . alas, they become too old and give up. Tomorrow has passed them by.
Sometimes couples don’t want the same things. One of my brothers-in-law yearned to travel, but my sister didn’t and refused to do so. Terminally ill at age 64, he gave me an atlas of the United States that he had bought, planning trips that they never took. “I know that you and Bill travel. I thought you might like to have this.” This poignant little gift touched my heart, and it also taught me a lesson: If at all possible try to help your life partner achieve his or her cherished dreams. Also, sometimes people selfishly and stubbornly refuse to do things that their partners enjoy. Even if you prefer country western to the symphony — or vice versa — it won’t hurt you to do what your spouse likes. Bill and I are very fortunate in that we enjoy the same things.
Friend Jana heard a motivator who advised, “Make a list of what you’d want to accomplish if you had only five more years, and start checking it off.” A few years ago, number 1 on our bucket list was finding a place on a lake, but we were unsuccessful.
To continue Thoreau’s words above: The true harvest of my daily life is as intangible and indescribable as the tints of morning or evening. It is a little stardust caught, a segment of the rainbow that I have clutched.
I told Vicki, “I enjoy coming to your house because it feels like being on vacation. She responded, “I absolutely love our house because it’s like being on vacation every day.” Nothing tops our pleasure at our children’s happiness. I doubt that I shall ever live on a lake or on the edge of the ocean, but I can take pleasure vicariously from Vicki’s and Tom’s life.
Even if our opportunities, health and energy level diminish with age, if we are willing to look, if we are willing to be flexible, we can at least catch glimpses of the stardust and rainbows that are there in our daily lives. wclarke@comcast.net